Friday, February 13, 2009
Grey Skies ...my current world sees no bright, clear skies ahead. for now, it's grey, not a storm, but not that good either. today's just been horrible. i can't find any other word to describe it, but my current mood is just, bad. i don't feel like doing anything. it's so frustrating and it's crippling me. i feel like i'm gonna explode and it's like all these emotions are gonna burst out of me. just as i started to relaxed from the stress i've accumulated over the week, things just had to happen. it's like i'm not entitled to relax at all. it's the day i've been waiting for all week, really happy in the morning, but just as afternoon came, my happiness vanished. my stress came back, and my load that i've been carrying seem to came back with a vengence of finishing me off.
how unpredictable can things get? just a moment ago, things were fine and suddenly, it's takes a total opposite turn for the worst. it's just beyond horrible and argh! i don't even know how to explain it. feel like screaming yet i have no more energy left for that. expanded all of my energy on the frustration, stress and all these disgusting emotions. life is really bleak for me now. i just wanna run away from reality.
my head hurts, and i'm SIAN in bold. wanna not think about it and move on, but the freaking cost it brings is really bothering me. i've really no time and energy for this kinds of things. can't they understand that. let me off the hook already. life is stressful as it is, i don't need additional stress and frustration from things that shouldn't happen at all. life, is so tough and difficult as it is. i'm so tired i wanna rest, but i can't. all these stress and frustration makes me have slight insomia or sleep problems, like waking up every one hour. then i pass the whole day drained and weak.
don't wanna talk anymore. shall try to sleep. life is ____________.
i need to get a job and a grip of myself. i could be in a worse things.
ryn ...
posted at 2/13/2009 09:02:00 pm
